You know what is stupid?

Free health care that isn't free. I mean I come from a province where when they say you don't pay for health care--you don't. I move to BC and BAM! All of a sudden I have premiums. Premiums that are apparently extra confusing.

(If you aren't in the mood for a tirade then skip until the end)

So confusing that a professional woman trained in the administration of benefits cannot seem to understand how they work. I spent the whole day at work today emailing the benefits administrator trying to get my health care premium payments straightened out so that BC Medical Services wouldn't put me into collection. Apparently they hadn't received a dime from my work (even though my half of the premiums were being deducted from my pay cheque) for the entire time I've been back to work. All because the benefit chick (yes she is a CHICK) doesn't know how to do her job. First she tells me that I have to fill out forms and call people and that it is my fault cause I didn't tell the MSP folk that I had returned to work. When I call them they tell me they can't do it on my say so and the benefits administrator has to do that. When I tell her this she emails me the wrong form and then tells me I have to go on line to get yet another form which I am responsible for filling out and returning to MSP. This turns out also to be untrue. At this point I am wondering exactly what this woman does all day long, as she knows fracking nothing about benefits!!!! If I, a completely untrained in the way of benefits girl can figure these things out, then why can she not? Grrrrrrr. I mean it's not like they pay me to actually do a job while I'm at work is it? If she had just bothered to check her information before sending off snarky emails, I would be ab-so-fracking-lutely grateful. Suprised but grateful.

Ahhhhhhh. That's better.

Happy Birthday Mr. Nate!

Nate's officially one year and one day old. So strange looking back at how tiny he was (and blobby and grub-like in that baby way), and now he's walking and jibber jabbering (ah, working in a Mr. T reference any way I can) away and giving us a serious run for our money. You can see a video of Nate on his birthday here. He's an absolute freak for balloons!

More soon. In the meantime watch the video and revel in the cuteness that is Nate.

My day off

and it is raining biblical-like outside. I had all these ambitious plans of going places and buying things today, but we just ended up staying inside. Not a bad day, just a very lazy one. Nate has been getting up late the past few days and having a late nap. This means that he doesn't have a second nap and gets pretty weird by the time five pm rolls around. He's not cranky so much as freaky. Laughing and crying at the same time and falling down a bit. Last night I tried hard and kept him up until 6:30 before he went down for the night and he still slept in until 7:30 or so this morning. I can't believe I've had about four days off in a row this week (long weekend plus a sick day that wasn't any fun) and I still don't quite feel rested. It is my brilliant conclusion that this is life as a parent. What I did do was catch up on at least two issues of Today's Parent magazine, which is now my new porn. I hafta say I'm loving reading the magazine. Mostly it has great articles on all the day to day stuff that you worry or wonder about (I only read it for the articles, honest). Some stuff is just general-like knowledge that I think will come in handy when Nate gets older.

It is about at this point (as I start contemplating how I'm going to cope with the terrible two tantrums, or what school we are going to put Nate in) when I ask myself if I miss the long-gone days of black eye liner and black combat boots, or the less long-gone days of the all night bursts of academic brilliance followed by weekends of partying, or the more recently gone days of splurging on expensive dinners and spur of the moment outings. Truth? Occasionally I miss the imagined freedom I had (we could just take off without having to worry about anything) before Nate came along (really though we had to factor in Snoopy before Nate). I also miss the lack of responsibility I had in previous incarnations of me (the student who only had to be responsible for feeding herself and her iguana). The truth is that I totally love the Mom thing.

I think I can live with being boring.

Damn Blogger 2

Does anyone know why the text gets all smushy when I post a picture and put text under it? They say this version is better, but really I think not. Also, my pictures don't turn out uniform in size.

This picks at me.

Happy New Year!

It is the year of the boar (or piggy, as I like to call it) so make sure your rice bins are full, avoid sweeping (you'll sweep out all the good luck!), and as with any other holiday, eat lovely food. We didn't get our act together this year for the New Year's dinner as we have in previous years, but there is hope for next year! Nate will get his first red packets tomorrow (I'm sure that it will take a few years to sink in that he gets money and this is a good thing to have). Tomorrow would be a day for visiting relatives with oranges and giving/accepting red packets for the children. Sadly, we don't have any family in town. This causes me some concern. I'm worried that Nate won't appreciate the Chinese part of his heritage, since we don't have Justin's folks close and we don't know any Chinese families here. I mean, I'd like to try, but it's hard for me to instruct Nate in a heritage that isn't mine and that his dad doesn't get particularly excited about. Maybe I worry too much. It's just that Nate has access to two very rich cultural backgrounds and I want to do right by him.

Of course, he won't know nuthin about nuthin just yet, so I guess I've got time to figure it all out.

I got cupcakes!!!!

My honey made me the yummiest cupcakes for Valentines Day!!! I'm a lucky girl. I got him boston cream doughnuts which I felt, in the face of the hand made cupcakes, seemed kind of lame, but he says he's a happy camper with his custard-filled pastry. So happy Valentines Day y'all, (corporate created day to sell stuff we don't really need and get way too hung up over)whether the day means anything to you or not, you should take time to be nice to yourself (so cheesy - love yourself - but it is true ya know).

Boo hiss Olympics

Continuing the hate-a-thon that is my blog with a nasty word or twelve on the coming Olympic games.

Today the news was chock a block with footage about the countdown to the Olympics, and stories about who should carry the frackin torch. I loathe the idea that the Olympics will be busting it's way into my home for many reasons. Both the provincial and municipal governments are spending tonnes and tonnes of cash on the stupid Olympics instead of on daycare spaces, housing for low income families, public transit that goes somewhere useful (instead of near the airport--'cause going straight to the airport would be too easy), community centres and generally providing children with education, food, and a place to live. The mayor is hawking an untried drug strategy instead of continuing programs that are working for people. Rents are soaring beyond belief so that people can't afford to live in the city.

It just plain hitches my wagon.

It is going to be crowded. I hate crowded. Crowded makes me pissy pissy pissy.

Also, everyone talks about how good this will be for the city, but I can't really see how. I mean, if you had property to sell in the city that wasn't your primary residence, or maybe sold Canadian flags, or maybe are a major hotel chain (or were the political leaders of a province or city and wanted to make it into the IOC someday). The supposed economic boost to the city isn't going to benefit the people who could use a few more bucks in rent subsidy, added day care spaces, a hot meal, etc.

It burns my ass that Gordon Campbell is getting so much play for this; the man who cut millions from legal aid, cut funding for women's centres, closed beds in health care facilities and instituted the infamous training wage allowing employers to pay paltry wages to 'new' employees.

Did I also mention I hate crowds? I'm thinking maybe we will take some time off and head for higher ground.

I only really like the hockey anyway.

I hate French

Not the French, just french. I worked a really good rant up the other day and got it half blogged and blogger kablooyed and then I got twice as angry but in a deflated why-do-I-bother way and gave up. The anger has not dissipated so I'm going to blog and maybe it will go away.

So I signed up for French class at work thinking that it would be a good thing to learn and thinking I would expand my horizons and learn and grow and all that. Also, I like french and it would be good for my career and work was paying for it, so I figured why not?

First, I am convinced that the guy who assessed me was on some king of reality altering drug, cause the answers I gave I am positive didn't add up to the level of French I was placed in. Sure I know some french, but the level seemed a little iffy to me. Plus the assessor kept asking me odd questions like "Can you describe to me, in French, how to get to the boardroom?" I said "no, but I can't tell you in English how to get to the boardroom, either-I suck at directions." Okay. I suppose that wasn't the best way to answer. But it was the truth.

So I go to French class with a co-worker and I find out that everyone else has been in the class since October. October folks! Asti! How am I supposed to catch up to that? THEN they go through the last test they wrote, and I am quickly finding out that I am in the wrong level. It would seem deceptively easy and then WHAM, Tirade is beaten over the head with the french grammar. Stuff I've never even heard of.

Oh, did I tell you the part where they didn't have any course materials for me? The instructor basically said "oops, guess I'll have to order some more." (in french, I got that part) No mention on how long that would take, or really what I was supposed to do in the mean time.

THEN, because it took so long to go over the test, we didn't get any of the modules completed before the end of class, so she said "well, guess you'll have to do the next six at home and see you next week." No lessons, no nuthin. Apparently the instructor is just there for show, the book does all the work.

Did I mention that throughout the class the instructor would basically make fun of the students? She's say things like "you really should know this by now," and "that's easy, why can't you do that?" (of course she never said that to me cause I imagined I looked sufficiently pissed by that time). Nothing like a positive learning environment ladies and gentleman. By half way through the class I was thinking about how to fake some kind of emergency or start a fist fight with my co-worker to get thrown out of the building. After the lesson she and I had a major debrief and decided we weren't going to return. I talked to someone in another of her classes and she actually said that she found the instructor 'scary.'

So now I'm kind of scared of french, and I hate being afraid of things, so it makes me pissy. I am not sure whether I'll try again at any level. I know that I'll definitely not attend with that instructor. I'd rather take a staple gun to my own tender goodies than put myself back there.

So much for my fun learning experience. Next time I'll take up something more fun, like accounting.

I wonder if I'll feel less angry now?

Walk baby walk

Hi there! How goes it?

Long time no see. It's a beautiful day outside, but Nate has a very hoarse voice and may be fighting a cold-so I think we will stay inside. He's still pretty chipper though. And he ate 1 1/2 fish sticks, broccili, a cracker and two cubes of blueberries for lunch. Is it starve a cold and feed a fever? Or the other way around? Who knows.

Further on the topic of Nate, he's walking lots now. All over the place. Walking walking walking. I described his walking like a cross between a drunk and a zombie. Still, he's walking. You can watch a video of him walking here. He's pretty damn pleased with himself, and is right this very minute walking around with a beanie puppy in one hand and tupperware in the other grinning his butt off.

I got a new haircut. I really like it. It is a very sharply inverted bob dyed red with white-blond highlights. I'm liking it a bunch and feel very good about it. Nothing like new hair to cheer you up. Work is going well. Really busy though. The workload is pretty crazy, but I enjoy it still.

Bad

First bad work day since I've been back. Everything I did today went sideways into the crap. The crap folks. THE CRAP. It started out with me waking up late and rushing to work with a headache, bad slept on hair and that puffy, sleepy face you get when you don't wake up properly. It didn't get any better.

bitchy bitchy bitch bitchity bitch

Now it's over.

I pray that tomorrow is not tainted by it's proximity to today.

date night

Justin was calling this my 'come hither' look. I'm hoping it's really not. If it is, I've lost my touch. But I like the photo.

mmmmmm....sushi

20

11) My first real crush was a guy named Jimmy Drake. We hung out for a while but he really liked quiet girls. The kicker is that I was trying so hard for him to like me (cool etc) that I totally missed this. I was 13 or so at the time.

12) I used to steal gum from the local corner store.

13) I was pretty sure I was going to hell for it, but it didn't stop me.

14) I honestly thought about becoming a nun once.

15) My feelings hurt easily.

16) I love comic books and sci-fi novels. I'm pretty much a nerd. This wasn't cool in any way shape or form when I was young.

17) I love AC/DC.

18) I hate jogging pants.

19) I have a very poor intuitive sense of direction but,

20) I'm good at reading maps.

The perfect day

Yesterday was a wonderful day. It was sunny and lovely and Snoopy, Nate, Justin and me spent it together. It was a perfect mix of getting stuff done and spending time together. Justin, lovely man that he is, let me sleep in, made me coffee and vacuumed. How wonderful is that? We had a late lunch at Sushi Yama and Nate ate his first piece of sushi (a yam roll with shredded daikon and shitake mushroom). I gave it to him thinking he would play with it and instead he ate the whole thing, seaweed and all! And then he ate another half piece! My boy loves the sushi. We came home and all had naps and then Justin and I went out for an honest to goodness date! We went to Kalamata and had lovely lamb dinners and talked about stuff. Just stuff. But just being able to sit and chat alone and away from the house was pure loveliness. Lots of it was about Nate, but really that's to be expected. The restaurant we went to was the last dinner I ever had as a non-mommy. I went into labour about five hours after we ate there with friends. Eleven months later the whole world has changed. For the better.

I had a wonderful day.

And a great post to be my 100th.

His "Ginn face"

10

In the spirit of MamaT's list posted on her site a while ago, I'm wanting to share a hundred things about myself. But I think it might strain my brain so I'm going to do it ten at a time.

1) I was originally supposed to have been named Laurie, but my grandfather wouldn't hear of it, so Patty was my mom's second choice.

2) When I was little my brother and I made up a story about a spider who lived in the wall named Fang. We would send tribute to him every once in a while to make sure he didn't come out (we were and are both scared of spiders).

3) I like pineapple and pizza, but not pineapple on my pizza.

4) I've never read War and Peace

5) I love fall, its my absolute favorite time of year.

6) I am allergic to peaches.

7) I was born in the year of the dog.

8) I am a Scorpio.

9) I failed grade 12 math.

10) I have been and still am a teeny bit afraid of skeletons.

Nate the great

has taken his first steps.

Actually, he took a couple a while ago but I wanted to make sure that they weren't total flukes before bragging about it. Now he is up to as many as four before he falls on his ass. Personally I believe that he could take more steps if he actually believed he could walk. We think it rocks, but Nate is convinced, I think, that crawling is still the fastest mode of conveying himself from one place to another.

Every night, after Justin gives him a bath, I give Nate a bottle and sing to him before he goes to sleep. I have discovered that I know very few children's songs...or lullabies...or songs I know all the words to. So sometimes I just make them up. Or sometimes they are very innapropriate. Or sometimes while I'm trying to think of something, songs will just pop into my head. Since he was born Justin and I have sung the wagon wheel song from the Old Crow Medicine Show, and Barrett's Privateers, that old Stan Rogers favorite. More recently the list has included:

The hockey night in Canada theme

Rio (Duran Duran)

Hotel California (The Eagles)

General Taylor (folk tune made popular by Great Big Sea)

I Wanna be Sedated (Ramones)

anything I can remember by Sinead O'Connor (how's that for setting the bar high)

Farewell to Nova Scotia

numerous songs by The Cure

He seems to like just about anything if you sing it while rocking him, and it keeps me from getting bored. I do realise though that I will have to try to learn better songs for the future. I have made a start with Raffi, but those songs I only seem to remember when I'm in the middle of a meeting at work, or singing to myself in my cubicle.

Nice one, Tirade.

Weekend Happy Dance!!!

So Justin had a dream last night that we had two Nathanials. I think he viewed it more as a nightmare, and I can see what he means. Nate has boundless amounts of energy. It is a cheerful and fun energy, but the kid is like the frickin energizer bunny (sans drum), and his poor tired old parents find it hard to keep up with him. He's been climbing the stairs a lot lately, and has figured out how to climb other objects as well. We are absolutely proud and totally dismayed by this at the same time. I'm also going to yank on my proud mommy hat and tell you another thing that my child has started doing lately. He puts himself to sleep!!!!! Yes indeedy, they told us this day would come but I didn't believe it! At bedtime we give him a bottle and cuddle him when he finishes it for a little bit. Then we put him into his crib and cover him up. Nate usually grabs his sucky, puts his head down and closes his eyes!!!!!!! That's it y'all! he just goes to sleep. It may not last, but who the hell cares. It is fracking fabulous for as long as it lasts.

I read a whole book last night after I put Nate to bed. This is a luxury that I have not had for a very long time (or so it seems). I remember the good old days of reading far into the night. It wasn't a particularly literary book, but I thoroughly enjoyed it. I left the house in a shambles, totally ignored the phone, laundry etc and just read. It was heaven.

Unfortunately all that stuff still needs to be done.

Still alive

Goddamnit! I can't believe it's been so long since I've posted anything. I apologise to all of the three of y'all or so who look me up from time to time. I'm settling in nicely to the life of working in an office again. Cubicle living is okay. EXCEPT. It is too frickin hot, all the time hot. Hot hot hot. Like the-sweat-on-my-ass-has-sweat-on-it's-ass hot. See, you can't please all o' the folks all o' the time, and some people are actually cold in the hot box of heatedness that is my daily environment. The temperature in the office is of continuous discussion by those who dwell in the cubes. But y'all that sucker is hot.

The other thing is that I am surrounded by the loveliest women at work, both in disposition and countenance. I feel so frumpy and all crazy mommy-like and I'm flanked by twenty somethings who have all the latest boots and fashiony gear and have gorgeous hair and actually have and take the time to wear make-up to work. ARRRRGHHH! They are such great people that I can't possibly hold it against them.

And ain't that a pisser?

This work thing

really cuts into my blogging. I'm a tired little federal employee at the end of the day. I'm liking it, though. The best thing is the people. I'm pretty much a people oriented person (a pop if you will). I like chatting and being around folks in general.

Nate is snotty snotty snotty. Where does all the stuff come from? There is a constant stream of mucus dripping out of his tiny button nose. He is standing up all by himself, bouncing up and down, and balancing pretty well. I'm afraid this will very soon morph into walking.

More tomorrow, tired girl has scrambled brains